dear alden,
you are fifteen and a half months old now and i am constantly reminding myself that you are still a baby. i need these reminders because you communicate so effectively and are so active that you seem almost like a Kid most days. you know, like one of those "keeeds" you admire so much on the playground. the ones you imitate by screaming nonsense? that's pretty amazing, by the way...

just the other night, i was giving you a bath and you placed one of your plastic stacking cups on your foot. i asked if you were wearing a cup shoe and then, realizing it sounded like a sneeze, i said "CUPSHOOO!" and you burst into the most magnificent peal of giggles--you got your first pun! of course, that was a few days ago and cups are old news. you're working now very diligently on the concept of open and closed (or shut--you use both words) and have been practicing with a soap bottle, turning your back to me when you want to try prying it open with your teeth, which you know is not allowed. we tried several different boxes and containers today, opening and closing most of them with some help. i was glad to see that your need to always have some small object in your right hand seemed to take a back seat to this new bit of work.

this morning as we said goodbye with hugs and kisses to papa as he went off to work, you held a small conversation with him about where he was going and then throughout the day you asked for him and whether he was still at work. you also asked for several of your friends by name--"coc, wat, hen" and then said, "class" and began to sing little bits of the vocal warm-ups we do in our tuesday music class and i realized you were asking if we were going today. you love that class so much. we listen to the cds at least once a day.

your aunt josie gave you two beautiful little baby dolls when we visited last month and you are so sweet to them. when they are dropped (or chucked, as they were by a buddy yesterday) you are clearly distressed and need to hug them right away.

now, don't be fooled, sweet bun of mine; you aren't always singing and hugging. you're just as likely to pull my hair or bite me as you are to give me a "squeeeeeeeeze" and you still really despise the fact that you (and we) need to sleep. you absolutely will not sit in a high chair for more than 5 minutes at a time and will arch your back and scream in protest if we attempt to force the issue at a restaurant. you are no longer fit for formalized public outings and really, come to think of it, you don't seem to like it when mama feeds herself at home either!

it is difficult, most days, to get you to eat any appreciable amount of food and you are on the small side for your age. though she mentioned this after stating that you are in perfect health, your doctor recently suggested that i nurse you less frequently in order to get you to eat more, but every time i am the least bit hesitant to allow you your "sides", as you call them, you seem so distraught that it feels very wrong to me to say no.  i decided long ago that i would allow you to self-wean and i haven't changed my mind about that, though there are days that i second guess that decision and wonder how such an active little guy can get by on so little food.

your energy and intensity also have me wondering whether or not i need to be reading up about toddlers a little more, but i think that papa and i understand you pretty well and can see where you're coming from most of the time. we are working on streamlining some loose guidelines as far as rules and discipline, which seem a special challenge, given your very sensitive (but obstinate!) nature.

you are overall a delight, my love. you are also currently awake at 10:33 pm and have been giving your papa a hard time for an hour now. go to sleep, little one.

love,
mama